I have not written in a long while… I don’t necessarily think that a lot has been going on but my brain has been busy with lots of differing thoughts. Things so far have been really good. It’s half way into the month and already things are good. I don’t want to jinx anything though so I’m just being optimistic.

There have been a lot of different thoughts in my head though. I wouldn’t necessarily say problems, perhaps things and situations that I have issues with, but nothing I can’t really handle. Usually, I keep  my thoughts private… I mean, they are my thoughts, so of course they’re private. Lately however, I find myself talking more and more about things. Which is not bad, it’s quite good I think. Two years ago I never would of talked about my problems with my friends or family. I considered them my problem so why should I share what’s going on with everyone else.

It’s weird, but sharing, talking about stuff, it helps. Psychologists can’t really explain it, but it has been proven that talking about any issues or stressors or problems that one is dealing with actually helps in making one feel better. The problem one if faced with isn’t necessarily fixed, but somehow, there’s a sense of relief when one talks about their problems.

I don’t really have any problems going on, things are actually quite good. But as I said, there are some issues. I’ve found myself talking about my issues with my friends and I have to admit, there was a sense of relief. Nothing in my situation changed, nothing made it better or worse. I did get a different perspective and that helps. I got a chance to look at the situation through another point of view.

In the end, how I decide to continue with things, it will be my own decision. After putting things into perspective I realize that I don’t necessarily have to make any decisions now. I have to just go with the flow, really just go with it and let things fall into place. It is out of my control, and I really don’t know what will happen or what can happen. Whatever does happen however, I’ll know that I didn’t sabotage myself or my thought process. That I didn’t run or hid.

Romantic situations are hard. They’re not easy to deal with. It is not a systematic series of decisions where it is easy to decipher right from wrong and a choice is made. Things are much more complicated than that. They are complicated even more when emotions are involved. Let’s face it, there’s a certain level of emotional commitment needed when it comes to romantic situations. Perhaps that’s my worry, emotions can cloud one’s judgment.

I think my problem is that I’m approaching this romantic situation as something that can be handled with logic and common sense. If it were only that easy, more and more people would be together, while others would realize that perhaps it would be best to break up. Really thinking about it can make you realize that a romantic situation is anything but a situation.

Perhaps I just complicate things, perhaps I’m probably a little scared of commitment, but I can’t help my natural instinct to question something that is unknown to me. To protect myself from any form of pain, whether emotional or physical is a natural instinct. I find myself questioning if the Fight or Flight response can apply to emotions as well.

Perhaps I’m just complicating my situation by thinking too much about it, or maybe, just maybe, I might be excited about what I might be embarking on.