I feel my head so busy. There is so much going on. Imagine a sea of butterflies, all of them clashing into each other creating wondrous colors and new breeds. Where two crash and join, another is born. Each an every single one of those butterflies, all pretty and colorful as they look, are like a thought in my head. There are just too damn many and although it may look pretty, I feel kind of stressed.

Perhaps it’s easier to make something that I don’t find appealing pretty, but that was just the best way to describe it. There is just so much activity going on. Perhaps I’m thinking too much, over analyzing, looking too deep, asking questions I don’t know if I want the answer too.

Perhaps it’s insecurities, or maybe the fact that I have no control over a lot of things right now.  Or maybe I’m just thinking too much, wanting to much and worrying too much like always.

I think I feel a mix of emotions… Worried, annoyed, thrilled, excited, concerned, abrasive, avoidant, indifferent, ambivalent, nervous, happy, glad, giddy, and the list goes on and on…

I need to start writing again. I haven’t really written in a while and I’m not sure how to just sit down and start. I know I want to and I have so many ideas to do so, I just have to place myself in that mindset. I can’t right now though. There is just too much going on in my little head. I need a break. I need a little getaway. I need to do something out of the norm and just take a little break. Maybe even for a day. Relax. Yeah, I could use some relaxation.